Today is December 1st and that means that it’s that time of year again. Time to start thinking about decorating, baking, wrapping presents and sending Christmas cards. I may be a scary chick, but I still love Christmas and all of it’s traditions. I just like it a little darker and quirky. Most years I make my Christmas cards because I just can’t find any that I like. You can only send out so many Edward Gorey Christmas cards before you get sick of it and want something different. As I was doing my searching this year I came across these Goth Christmas cards from Moonlake Designs. They are all designed by a graphic artist in Wales. They are fantastic! A little Christmas, a little dark and a little humor. Moonlake Designs are sold through Greeting Card Universe and cost $2.79 ea. Yes, I know, a little expensive if you are sending a lot of cards, but totally worth it. You have to cough it up if you want something a little unusual. They will even custom print your message on them. There are quite a few different styles including non-Christmas ones, so look around.

Today has been a very frustrating day and there are a few people that I wouldn’t mind taking out. You know those kind of days, don’t you? As I was searching for something to write about today I noticed there was a distinct slant to my searches. I started by searching on the word blood and it just went down hill from there. Of course, right off the bat, I found something I thought was so cool and proceeded to try and find out where it could be purchased. Not as easy as it sounds. A lot of companies use different names for the same product, so what could be called a bloody knife on one site is called halloween knife on another. Anyway, after more than a two hour exhaustive search online and on the phone I discovered that the item was discontinued. This just pissed me off. It happens a lot actually, but on days like this it really sends you over the edge. I won’t mention the item, because I don’t want you lusting after it like I am and then getting up in my face because I wrote about something that you can’t have. So, my search for blood continued and I came across this cool little item. Depending on what site you go to it can be called anywhere from Bloody Bookmark to Liquid Bookmark. For my purposes (and mood) I’m going with Bloody Bookmark. This bookmark is actually made in Japan from hand poured silicone, so no two are alike. Depending on which site you purchase from it also comes in a milk version (white) and mercury (dark grey). Can you guess my favorite? The Bloody Bookmark retails at $9.99 from Thinkgeek.com, but other sites also sell it in a three piece set for $29. Just think of all the fun you could have with this. No one says it has to be used as a bookmark. If you plan on buying this though, be prepared for the dumbass jokes that will get repeated over and over. This bookmark can be especially dangerous if you are a woman reading in public. Every guy will think he’s being cute and original when he says, “Excuse me, but I believe your book is bleeding.”

Here’s the scary product of the week. This Spider Mouse would probably be too scary for me to use. I would be terrified that the thing would come back to life and escape. I’m assuming they are dead, but I can’t read Japanese so who knows. Can you imagine your co-workers seeing that on your desk? You can also get it with some other bugs, but I think the spider is the scariest. The spiders or insects are sealed inside a pocket of clear gel to preserve them and then some internal LED lights to light them up and make them even more scary. They apparently sell for only 1,480 yen  which is about $15. Pretty cheap, but I’m sure shipping from Japan would be pretty high. In case you are reading this Scary Hubby I DO NOT want one of these for my birthday.

Once again my favorite store, Pylones, comes through for me. I love the wild and crazy stuff they carry. Everything is so cool and useful. They recently unveiled a bunch of stuff that is coming out soon including this Skull Stapler. I have looked and looked for a neat skull stapler over the years and have never found one that didn’t look homemade. This one is awesome and the brain lid even comes off so you can store things inside. If you’re not a fan of the funky colors it also comes in a more plain, silver version. Either way it’s ridiculously creepy and fun. Just think of all the fun you can have playing with this over the wall of your cubicle. Use him as a puppet and say, “I’m going to eat your brains!” It’s sure to make you a hit in the office. It doesn’t go on sale until March and is going to cost a whopping $49, but who cares? When something is cool, original and doubles as a toy to torture your office mates with it’s worthing slapping down a little extra cash, right? At least that’s the logic I’ll use when Scary Hubby sees the bill.

So, there is a woman in France that designs lamp shades and calls them Spooky Shades. Elisa refers to herself as a rock n’ roll/metal fan who was frustrated with the lack of interesting and funky housewares available in stores. She particularly didn’t like all of the plain lamp shades out there, so decided to make her own edgy ones. What Elisa has come up with is just fantastic. I’m not neccessarily a metal fan, but there are a lot of common design elements between that and my preferred scary lifestyle. There are ones based on horror movies, skulls and even one with anatomy sketches over a Jack the Ripper letter which I might add is my personal favorite. Each one appears to be different and one of kind and she updates often with new styles. If you don’t see one you like now, keep checking back because her stock changes often.

I know it’s already the middle of January, but I have another calendar for you that I just couldn’t not talk about. Someone sent me the link to this site where they feature a Coffin Calendar. I believe the calendar is actually called Sexy Coffins Calendar. This calendar is created by Cisa, a funeral home and coffin factory based in Rome, Italy. I suppose it is a way to advertise their…uh…services. On the page you can look through the pictures featured each month. As I was looking through it I noticed something. Well, first off I should point out that each calendar features one or more scantily clad goth girls posing around coffins. Some of them are pretty cool and some of them just T&A crap. On closer inspection, though, you will notice that in every single picture they are using the exact same coffin. Huh? First of all the Calendar is called “Sexy Coffins”. So apparently either they carry only one coffin that they believe to be sexy or it is just a sexy goth girl calendar in disguise. Secondly, I understand putting the scantily clad women around the coffin, but if you are trying to promote your business wouldn’t it make more sense to show a different coffin in each picture? You too can own this calendar for the small price of $16.95, but if you were looking for a brochure from the company look elsewhere.

*Thanks Angelia for the link

Since it’s a new year tomorrow I was thinking I needed a calendar. So, Scary Hubby and I went to Borders yesterday and I bought one for my office. Scary calendars are not always easy to find, but I did find a Black Cats Calendar that I loved. It made me think of my little Agatha who is going through the last stages of kidney failure. Scary Hubby said it made him too sad to have it in the house, but I said that it was in honor of her and we do have 2 other black cats in the house. Now I know there are people out there that get nervous around black cats especially if they cross their path, but I like to think of them as good luck. Our three black cats have brought us nothing but happiness and love. Anyway, it’s very rare to have an entirely black cat. Most of them have at least one white hair somewhere. So, if you are superstitious about it, just tell yourself that it’s probably not a solid black cat next time one crosses your path. Unless of course you are going under a ladder at the same time, then all bets are off.

Are you tired of vampires? Are you sick of hearing about the Twilight stars? Well, I am! So hears more. Actually this one is more interesting. My Mother-in-Law of all people alerted me to this. Just shows how cool she is. Anyway, it’s an iPhone app called Vampire Transformer that was created by Peter Facinelli (Dr. Carlisle Cullen from Twilight) and the 211me.com team. It allows you to transform a photo of someone into a vampire. You can blend your photo with one of over 30 vampires to create your own personal vampire. Then you can send your creations to Twitter, Facebook, and their online Vampire Gallery. It’s all done with layers, so the more layers you use the grosser you get. You do have to have an iPhone to get the app. I downloaded it earlier and I’ve been having a blast with it. Try doing it to pictures of your pets or babies. That’s when it gets really twisted.

Are you into headbanger music? Are you a fan of the Headbanger’s Ball on MTV? Well, I’m not, but at one time when the original Headbanger’s Ball was on MTV I was. Now you can have computer speakers that will take your headbanging to a whole new level. These Skull Computer Speakers look like they have been headbanging a few too many times actually. Maybe you should give them a break, let them rest and only play Barry Manilow on them. Or maybe you should let your true nature show and put these two little guys in your cubicle at work. Be proud of your headbanging ways and wear your concert tees with pride in the office. No one will ever mistake you for that preppy prick in accounting again.

Ever get frustrated at work? Ever feel like stabbing your boss with a pen? I am my own boss and even I feel like doing that sometimes. I mean my boss is a total bitch. We all have days like that. Just some more than others. Who really cares about those dumb stress balls. They don’t work. Why don’t you picture yourself holding a pen and thinking about that dumb boss that just reminded you again about remembering to put the new cover sheets on the TPS reports (if you don’t get that reference then you should check out Office Space and see what a really stupid boss is like). Now wouldn’t it be nice to have a place to stab that pen into without worrying about going to jail? That’s what Dead Fred is for! He’s a little red silicone guy that’s actually a pen holder. You can stab that pen into his heart a hundred times and he won’t ever call 911. Just don’t yell out your boss’ name while doing it or it could get you fired.