If you have been diligently reading my blog (you better be) you would know that I just love to piss off my neighbors. I know, not very neighborly, but oh so much fun. Besides, it seems like it has become sort of a running joke in the neighborhood. What will Jane do next? Most of them get a good laugh out of it since we do take good care of our yard, but there are a few that are not so thrilled. That’s mainly why I do it. If they laughed and enjoyed it I’d get bored.
Everyone has seen the pink yard flamingos and a few have even seen the skeleton flamingos, but now a couple of artists selling under the name Chris and Janes Place on Etsy have come up with their own twist. Zombie Gnomes feeding on one of those oh so tacky pink flamingos. They are hand casted, hand painted and sell for $55. They have been getting so many orders for these that they are a little behind in production, but so worth the wait. I am so excited to get mine. Now I just need to think of a great way to reveal it to the neighbors

Now you can give zombies a taste of their own medicine with these Zombie Pops. They are made out of white and milk chocolate with a custom mold made by Starlingskies on Etsy, so you will not find them anywhere else. Who knew zombies were made out of chocolate? I would not have been so scared of them last time they chased me into The Winchester Pub. Next time I’ll just turn around and take a bite out of their brains first. We’ll see who’s doing the running away then.

Since I’ve clearly been on some kind of weird baby kick lately I figured I’d post this little item I’ve had sitting on my desktop for the last few years. I found this Gothic Baby Crib Set from Kustom Kids Bedding quite a while ago and I knew one day I’d write about it. First, though, I must point out how pissed off I am that this didn’t exist when Scary Daughter was a baby. I would just kill for the chance to decorate a nursery again. Not for the baby, I’ve had enough of that, but just for my own pleasure. I guess I always assumed we’d have another Scary Kid, so I could justify purchasing it, but we are just a one Scary Kid kinda family. Maybe I could buy it for that one day in the way way future that I’ll be a Scary Grandma Jane. Luckily Scary Daughter is taking after me and loves all things scary, so I think she’ll be good with that. Do you think it’s too early to shell out the $375 for my 9 year old’s future child? Probably. Make that hopefully!

When I am looking for new stuff to post about I sometimes search on random words put together. A lot of times my word mixtures do not produce anything, but once in awhile I get lucky and hit upon some uber creepy item. Today’s creepy item is the Baby Lamp. Yes, those are the everyday words I searched on. I was just spitballing. I didn’t really think anything would come up of interest. Wow, was I wrong! I thought maybe this was just a design project or something, but no it’s a mass produced item that you can purchase online from a real store. I mean, really?!? What the hell? I love creepy stuff, but this is just weird. Is it really meant for a nursery or is it just a novelty? What really cracks me up is the cord coming out of his butt. Wouldn’t it have been better if it came out of his belly button like an umbilical cord? This little weirdo comes in various colors and can be had for about $100. So, what are you waiting for? Don’t you want one for your desk at work?

It may be a little early to start thinking about camping or even barbecuing for that matter, but a lot depends on what part of the world you live in. If you live in Australia, for example, then it’s the perfect time. In other words don’t judge me for today’s post. I have my reasons for posting what I do and as soon as I have figured out this one you’ll be the first to know. I’m a little bitchy today, so watch out! Anyway, I found this handy dandy little Cthulhu Weenie Roaster while I was searching for a gift for Scary Hubby over the holidays and I have been obsessed with it ever since. How can you not be? It’s a freakin weenie roaster in the shape of Cthulhu! To me it looks more like a skull with some freaky long teeth, but who cares? This is the perfect gift for that creepy guy in your life that has everything. And just think, whenever he’s cooking you a weenie it’ll be plumped and cooked to perfection. Now that’s how I like my weenie!

* See Wikipedia if you don’t know who or what a Cthulhu is.

Happy 2012 people! Let’s make it a happy and healthy year!
So, I thought it was appropriate to post a baby related item since babies are a symbol of the New Year. I ended up coming across this creepy sculpture called Big Baby. Brooklyn, NY artist Nina Levy was originally commissioned to create Big Baby for the Aldrich Museum of Contemporary Art in Ridgefield, CT in 2003. The museum was doing renovations and thought the baby would symbolize the museum’s “rebirth”. It ended up causing quite a bit of controversy and was vandalized. Now it sits in the de Cordova Sculpture Park and Museum in Lincoln, MA. The baby is 7′ tall and I find it to be more than just a little creepy. Could you imagine driving down the street and seeing that baby just sitting there on a bench? I would think the thing might have caused a few accidents while it sat in front of the museum. For some reason it made me think of that movie Trainspotting. Maybe just because that gravity defying baby creeped me out too.

So two years ago I posted my own version of The Night Before Christmas. This year I received an early present when Scary Jane reader Sarah sent me the coloring book illustrations that her husband Todd Wilson created to go along with my words. And they let me share it here on the site. Enjoy! (more…)

Okay, I know I did a post yesterday on soap, but I had to write about this soap that one of my loyal readers alerted me to. These are Soap Fingers made by LoveLeeSoaps on Etsy and are watermelon scented. I have no idea what the connection to watermelon that fingers have except that you use your hands to eat watermelon. You get four realistic looking fingers for $5.00. It’s a great price, but I wonder if I could get a five-finger discount?

* Thanks Eugenie5 for the heads up!

I’ve been on a soap kick lately. Actually more of a bath products kick. Ever since I was visiting Texas and went to a store in Dallas called Bath Junkie a couple of weeks ago. You can actually scent and color your own bath products! I had so much fun creating and discovering my own personal scent. The only down side? They didn’t have any red colorant. Unfortunately all of the colors were pretty pale and cutesy. My master bathroom is made up of browns, blacks and deep reds, so I ended up going with the kind of khaki color they had. I’m not particularly wild about their logo either come to think about it. I would have preferred something vintage looking, but that’s just me. I just wish there was a franchise near me. Anyway, I started looking around for some fun scary soap options and came across this Coffin Soap. Absolutely love it. It’s a little pricey at $5.75 a bar, but it would be more for display anyway. I could make a little soap graveyard display for my bathroom! It’s scented with their own Wicked Witch’s Brew fragrance, but you can also request something different. The only thing is… What does it say? Every time I study the picture I think it says something different. I know, I could just email them and ask, but I’m too lazy and what would be the fun in that? Let me know if you can figure it out.

This is the time of the year when everyone is rushing around everywhere trying to get the best deals, buying a tree, decorating, baking etc. It’s a struggle every year to get Christmas decorations that aren’t so damn cheerful. I like Christmas as much as the next person, but you may have noticed that I like things a little more dark. At least I hope you have. Scary daughter loves to make a Gingerbread House every year. I supply her with the kit, but usually substitute the candy and frosting for something more scary. I usually will make small Gingerbread men for her to place around the little house. I’ve tried many different things to make them a little scary, but none have turned out well. Yesterday I found a Gingerdead Men Cookie Cutter on Fred that will be perfect. Unfortunately he is the more traditional sized Gingerbread Men Cookie Cutter. I figure that they will not only be dead Gingerbread Men, but they’ll be giants in the Gingerbread House world. What could be more scary? I think I’ll still make the little ones and they can be running away from the big scary Gingerbread Men. Need I even mention how awesome these guys will be for the stupid neighborhood Cookie Swap?